Over the last couple of weeks, I have been watching a Facebook friend deal with her emotions as she watches her father slowly step closer to death. She posts updates and pictures of him almost everyday. This seems to be the time of year when so many older folks pass on. I'm really not sure why. My own ex mother in law passed away on December 10th, the same day my mom passed on many years ago. Other friends have also had loved ones succumb to death in December. As for my friend, I have come to look forward to her posts about father.
I'm writing about this because my friend has been so open in sharing her struggle as well as the struggles of her father. And reading about it has caused me to think about how we die. You can tell by the pictures she posts that her dad is close to passing, but another day goes by and he is still here. You can see the strain on her as she almost wishes he would go....that it would be a relief to the both of them. I know it would be for her. But for him, I wonder if he is content with waiting for death to overtake him. Or is he fighting death to the final, inevitable outcome....making death earn its victory? That's how I would like to imagine it. I'm not sure why, but everyday when I see him still alive I feel happy. I'm happy in knowing that he defeated death for another day. It reminds me of the movie, The Outlaw Josey Wales, when the boy says "We whooped 'em again, didn't we Josey?" I know we cannot defeat death forever. And there comes a time when it is ok to just let go and pass on. But I just have mad respect for the people who fight it and defeat it. It's like being down 40-0 in a football game. You keep playing hard and fighting....making the other team earn their inevitable victory.
Sadly, though, her father finally passed. So to my friend, my heart goes out to you. So many of us know the struggles you are enduring right now. And to your dad.....what a noble fight you put on, Warrior. You definitely made death earn it.
Me
Looking Business-like
Friday, December 28, 2012
Thursday, December 27, 2012
New Year's Resolution? Or Something Better?
This year, instead of coming up with a resolution for the whole year, come up with New Day's resolutions!! When you make a resolution you are resolving to accomplish something. Maybe you want to lose weight. Or start an exercise program. Or stop smoking. Whatever it is, I want you to resolve to accomplish it for just one day. That's it. One day. Then resolve to accomplish it the next day and then the next day after that. That's all you need to do to achieve the results you desire anyway.
Most people make a resolution for the year and when they slip for a day or two or three, they deem themselves a failure and quit altogether. But if you make a resolution every day, then if you miss a day...or slip up, then it isn't as big a deal. You just make the resolution again the next day and work to accomplish it. Just one day. Add all those days together and think of how many pounds you will have lost. Think of all the days you will have exercised. Think of all the days you didn't smoke. Think of all the negative habits that have now been replaced with newer, more positive habits. And isn't that the goal of making resolutions in the first place? My wish for you is that you accomplish and achieve all that you want in 2013.....one day at a time.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Anger- Elixir of The Gods
Do you ever get angry? Of course you do. I hope you are not one of those people that say you never get angry or that you are somehow adept at avoiding anger. Simply put, you are just lying to yourself. So many of us are scared to admit that we get angry over certain things. Our society thinks that anger is a negative thing to be avoided at all costs. This thinking is wrong!!
You see, people are doing something that angers us everyday. They cut us off in traffic, they yell at us at our jobs, horrible and senseless events happen in the world.......Plenty of things making us angry. It is not the anger that is the bad guy here. It is our response to the anger. If we choose to respond with a tantrum, then we achieved nothing. If we bottle it up inside of us until the anger goes away, we have wasted a golden opportunity. Anger is nothing but pure energy. Watch an angry person. They have so much energy flowing through them they can't even contain. Their voice gets louder and they talk faster. Their movements become more jerky and animated. Why? Because they have all this new energy and don't know how to harness it.
This energy can, and should, be used for positive actions. If you're an older adult and decide to go back to college and your friends and family make fun of that decision, you are going to feel angry that they are not supporting your efforts and dreams. Great!! Get angry and then use the energy that the anger has given you to study harder, longer and more effectively. Trying to lose weight? People making fun of you and pointing out how you have already been on 20 diets already? Great!! Get angry and use that energy to become more resolute, more diligent, more disciplined.
Professional athletes know the benefits of anger. If you have ever been in a football teams locker room before a game, you have seen some bizarre rituals. You'll see men stomping back and forth yelling at themselves. Two men will start punching each other. They'll put their helmets on and head butt one another. They'll yell and scream and stir themselves into a frenzy of bloodlust. Why? Because they know that anger gives them extra energy. They know that they need any and every edge they can get over their competition. They don't really hate the other team. They aren't really angry with the other team. But they created anger. They manufactured anger so that they could harness its energy.
For you peaceniks out there, Mother Theresa got angry. She used that anger to impact the lives of many of the poorest people on our planet. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr got angry. He used that anger to achieve the basic freedoms for all people, most notably those of his same skin color. Gandhi got angry. He used that anger to drive out an oppressive government from his homeland. Jesus got angry. He used that anger to drive out the money-changers from His temple. All these people were nonviolent, but they were not non-angry. They accepted their anger and then they used their anger for a positive result.
So don't be afraid of your anger. Don't repress it, suppress or deny it. Accept it for the tool that it is. A treasure chest of energy to be used for positive actions. And if you aren't angry or energetic about anything, then you can always follow the examples of successful pro athletes and manufacture some anger.
You see, people are doing something that angers us everyday. They cut us off in traffic, they yell at us at our jobs, horrible and senseless events happen in the world.......Plenty of things making us angry. It is not the anger that is the bad guy here. It is our response to the anger. If we choose to respond with a tantrum, then we achieved nothing. If we bottle it up inside of us until the anger goes away, we have wasted a golden opportunity. Anger is nothing but pure energy. Watch an angry person. They have so much energy flowing through them they can't even contain. Their voice gets louder and they talk faster. Their movements become more jerky and animated. Why? Because they have all this new energy and don't know how to harness it.
This energy can, and should, be used for positive actions. If you're an older adult and decide to go back to college and your friends and family make fun of that decision, you are going to feel angry that they are not supporting your efforts and dreams. Great!! Get angry and then use the energy that the anger has given you to study harder, longer and more effectively. Trying to lose weight? People making fun of you and pointing out how you have already been on 20 diets already? Great!! Get angry and use that energy to become more resolute, more diligent, more disciplined.
Professional athletes know the benefits of anger. If you have ever been in a football teams locker room before a game, you have seen some bizarre rituals. You'll see men stomping back and forth yelling at themselves. Two men will start punching each other. They'll put their helmets on and head butt one another. They'll yell and scream and stir themselves into a frenzy of bloodlust. Why? Because they know that anger gives them extra energy. They know that they need any and every edge they can get over their competition. They don't really hate the other team. They aren't really angry with the other team. But they created anger. They manufactured anger so that they could harness its energy.
For you peaceniks out there, Mother Theresa got angry. She used that anger to impact the lives of many of the poorest people on our planet. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr got angry. He used that anger to achieve the basic freedoms for all people, most notably those of his same skin color. Gandhi got angry. He used that anger to drive out an oppressive government from his homeland. Jesus got angry. He used that anger to drive out the money-changers from His temple. All these people were nonviolent, but they were not non-angry. They accepted their anger and then they used their anger for a positive result.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Productivity vs Activity
Let me tell you a story about myself. When I was a restaurant manager, I had a server who worked my last nerve. This guy was a pretty good server. If anything, he could be too good...sometimes becoming more of an interruption to his customers than necessary. But that aside, he was good. Except, that servers in restaurants have a little thing called sidework. For those of you who have worked as a server, you probably just cringed at the word....sidework. Sidework is that work a server must do on top of waiting their tables. It usually entails rolling silverware into napkins and cleaning certain areas of the restaurant. Well, this guy was a master at putting it off.
When confronted with why his sidework wasn't getting done, Sam (not his real name) would tell of how busy he was and to not worry, that it would all get done. Yet, at the end of his shift, he wouldn't even be close to finishing. I started watching him shift after shift, and I began to notice that he flew around the restaurant like a mini-tornado. At first glance, it would seem as though he were truly busy. But he was not actually doing anything. He was only moving quickly from one spot to another. Like a fly buzzing around, searching for that oh-so-perfect pile of poop to land on. Anyone who has worked for me or knows me, knows that his actions didn't sit very well with me. Let's just say we had a mutual dislike for one another......I didn't like how he tried to get out of doing his job and he didn't like how I held him to standards of his job.
How many of us, though, act like Sam? We buzz around like busy little bees but at the end of the day have nothing, or very little, to show for it. I mean if these people really were bees they would be fired from the colony for producing no honey. In our world, no honey = no money. You see, production is where it's at. Produce the result you are being paid to produce and all is well. Don't produce and you can't act surprised at the consequences. Your actions really are NOT good enough. Simply showing up to work isn't enough, either. You are not being paid to show up. Shoot, a dog can be trained to be a certain place at a certain time. Even a cat knows what time is feeding time and where the food bowl is. But you are to do more. You are to produce measurable results. Whether you work for someone else or for yourself, the future probability of you continuing to get paid rests solely on production of results and not actions or good intentions.
So, cut out the busy bee, do-nothing actions of your day and ramp up the results producing actions that will simplify or de-stress your life. Cut out the time wasting activities of your work and replace them with actions that create tangible, measurable, positive results and watch your business stature and success grow.
When confronted with why his sidework wasn't getting done, Sam (not his real name) would tell of how busy he was and to not worry, that it would all get done. Yet, at the end of his shift, he wouldn't even be close to finishing. I started watching him shift after shift, and I began to notice that he flew around the restaurant like a mini-tornado. At first glance, it would seem as though he were truly busy. But he was not actually doing anything. He was only moving quickly from one spot to another. Like a fly buzzing around, searching for that oh-so-perfect pile of poop to land on. Anyone who has worked for me or knows me, knows that his actions didn't sit very well with me. Let's just say we had a mutual dislike for one another......I didn't like how he tried to get out of doing his job and he didn't like how I held him to standards of his job.
How many of us, though, act like Sam? We buzz around like busy little bees but at the end of the day have nothing, or very little, to show for it. I mean if these people really were bees they would be fired from the colony for producing no honey. In our world, no honey = no money. You see, production is where it's at. Produce the result you are being paid to produce and all is well. Don't produce and you can't act surprised at the consequences. Your actions really are NOT good enough. Simply showing up to work isn't enough, either. You are not being paid to show up. Shoot, a dog can be trained to be a certain place at a certain time. Even a cat knows what time is feeding time and where the food bowl is. But you are to do more. You are to produce measurable results. Whether you work for someone else or for yourself, the future probability of you continuing to get paid rests solely on production of results and not actions or good intentions.
So, cut out the busy bee, do-nothing actions of your day and ramp up the results producing actions that will simplify or de-stress your life. Cut out the time wasting activities of your work and replace them with actions that create tangible, measurable, positive results and watch your business stature and success grow.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
How To Pray For What You Want
So, yesterday I talked about how you should be careful about what you pray for. People tend to get mired in their everyday problems and become overwhelmed and frustrated. They then cry out for help in the form of a prayer and are dismayed when they don't get what they want but DO get what they prayed for. What happened? Well, they asked/prayed for the wrong thing. They were not clear on how to ask, specifically, for what they truly desired.
In our worldly, human relationships we are often unclear when we ask for something. We hint at what we desire and hope that our partner somehow "gets" it or "reads" our minds. But God doesn't operate that way. Even if you do not believe in God but instead believe in a Universal Power, the lesson is the same. You get exactly what you are asking for. And to properly ask for something requires you to have the belief that you will receive it. Therefore, you might ask for a brand new bicycle but if you believe you will not get it, then you are more likely to not get it.
Your belief must align with your prayer/asking. When those are in conflict, which will you receive? Will you get what you truly desire? Or will you get what it is you specifically asked for? Well, it usually depends on where the majority of your focus is. When people ask for strength, they are usually focused on exactly that.....being stronger so as to overcome their problems. So, they get experiences that will strengthen them. If their focus was on having fewer problems or on having their load lightened, they would be more likely to receive that.
So get specific with what it is you want. Ask and pray in a direct, honest language that is very clear on what you desire. Then, believe that you will receive it.
In our worldly, human relationships we are often unclear when we ask for something. We hint at what we desire and hope that our partner somehow "gets" it or "reads" our minds. But God doesn't operate that way. Even if you do not believe in God but instead believe in a Universal Power, the lesson is the same. You get exactly what you are asking for. And to properly ask for something requires you to have the belief that you will receive it. Therefore, you might ask for a brand new bicycle but if you believe you will not get it, then you are more likely to not get it.
Your belief must align with your prayer/asking. When those are in conflict, which will you receive? Will you get what you truly desire? Or will you get what it is you specifically asked for? Well, it usually depends on where the majority of your focus is. When people ask for strength, they are usually focused on exactly that.....being stronger so as to overcome their problems. So, they get experiences that will strengthen them. If their focus was on having fewer problems or on having their load lightened, they would be more likely to receive that.
So get specific with what it is you want. Ask and pray in a direct, honest language that is very clear on what you desire. Then, believe that you will receive it.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Be Careful What You Pray For
So often I hear people praying who are struggling with something. Sometimes, they are having relationship problems. Or financial troubles. Issues with their children. Their health. So many different things that we all endure from time to time. One of the most popular prayers I hear is, "Lord, give me strength." Usually, what they are saying is that they feel their problems are so overwhelming that they cannot handle it and need an extra push to get them over.
However, that is not what they asked for and not how strength is achieved. Anyone who has ever lifted weights will tell you that the way to increase strength is to increase resistance. That's right. You pray for strength, you are praying for MORE resistance in your life....not less. You are asking for an increase in problems. You are asking for more weight to be placed across your shoulders. You are asking for more resistance so that you will develop the strength you prayed for. Be careful what you pray for.
Another prayer I hear people praying is "Lord, give me patience." These people feel so stressed about life that they think they might snap at any moment. That they might have a nervous breakdown. They don't realize they already have patience within them. So, by asking for patience, they are actually asking for more than they already possess. This leads us to the same scenario as with strength. These people will now be given more situations that will require a higher degree of patience from them. They will be given more troubles and more stress and less time with which to get everything done that needs to be accomplished. They will be given this so that they can develop the very thing they prayed for......patience. Be careful what you pray for.
Yes, I say to be careful what you pray for because......you might just get it!!!
However, that is not what they asked for and not how strength is achieved. Anyone who has ever lifted weights will tell you that the way to increase strength is to increase resistance. That's right. You pray for strength, you are praying for MORE resistance in your life....not less. You are asking for an increase in problems. You are asking for more weight to be placed across your shoulders. You are asking for more resistance so that you will develop the strength you prayed for. Be careful what you pray for.
Another prayer I hear people praying is "Lord, give me patience." These people feel so stressed about life that they think they might snap at any moment. That they might have a nervous breakdown. They don't realize they already have patience within them. So, by asking for patience, they are actually asking for more than they already possess. This leads us to the same scenario as with strength. These people will now be given more situations that will require a higher degree of patience from them. They will be given more troubles and more stress and less time with which to get everything done that needs to be accomplished. They will be given this so that they can develop the very thing they prayed for......patience. Be careful what you pray for.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Credibility
What do you think of when you hear the word, credibility? The book definition is "the quality of being trusted." Trust and credibility are both traits that you cannot give yourself. Only others can give it to you. Now, the question....how do we inspire people to trust us, to gives us credibility?
Well, showing someone you truly care about them and have their best interests at heart is the first step. Once people begin to learn about you, they will want to know some things about your past....your "story". Many of us have been through tough times. Relating this to people shows that you, too, have struggled and know the feelings of how hard life can be. You build your credibility to lead people by the storms you have endured.
Have you ever seen those TV preachers? they always act as though they have been walking on water since the age of 5. Who can relate to that? How does this build their credibility? Do we even believe this person? Hard for me to. I can definitely respect the people who say, and show, that they have endured struggles. That they have walked through the fire and come out the other side a better person for the experience. That person has built their credibility with me.
So, do you want to have credibility in peoples eyes? Do you want the "quality of being trusted"? If you do, then show people how much you care for them. Be honest in who and what you are. And be transparent about your struggles, either from the past or in the present. You will then inspire trust and earn your credibility.
Well, showing someone you truly care about them and have their best interests at heart is the first step. Once people begin to learn about you, they will want to know some things about your past....your "story". Many of us have been through tough times. Relating this to people shows that you, too, have struggled and know the feelings of how hard life can be. You build your credibility to lead people by the storms you have endured.
Have you ever seen those TV preachers? they always act as though they have been walking on water since the age of 5. Who can relate to that? How does this build their credibility? Do we even believe this person? Hard for me to. I can definitely respect the people who say, and show, that they have endured struggles. That they have walked through the fire and come out the other side a better person for the experience. That person has built their credibility with me.
So, do you want to have credibility in peoples eyes? Do you want the "quality of being trusted"? If you do, then show people how much you care for them. Be honest in who and what you are. And be transparent about your struggles, either from the past or in the present. You will then inspire trust and earn your credibility.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Where Are My Friends Today
Momma, where are my
friends today
I saw them at school
just yesterday
Daddy, where are my
friends today
(Would you know what
to say)
Momma, where are my
friends today
I want to go to their
house and play
Daddy, where are my
friends today
Don’t we have a
soccer game today
Momma where are my
friends today
I saw them at school
just yesterday
Daddy, why did the
man take my friends away
(Would you know what
to say)
God, where are my
friends today
Child, your friends
are here with Me today
They can see you and
they want to say
They grew their wings
and flew away
God, I want my
friends so I can play
God, promise me my friends are ok
Child, your friends are with Me and they want to say
We are in Heaven....and have gone out to play.
Friday, December 14, 2012
The Great Momentum
The definition of momentum is the impetus of a moving object. Momentum remains constant unless it is acted upon by an outside force. In classical mechanics, it is defined as mass times velocity. Or the size of the object multiplied by the speed it is moving. Business leaders, sports coaches and motivational experts are always speaking about taking "massive action". Massive is the size and action is the velocity. The bigger and faster you can move yourself, your idea, your goals, the football or whatever, then the more momentum you will have generated.
Momentum is your best friend. I don't care who you are or what you do, momentum is a necessity. Sometimes, momentum is the only difference between winning and losing...achieving and failing. It is extremely difficult to get momentum and even more difficult to keep it. But keep it you must. If you have ever watched the 100 Meter dash in the Olympics you will see that the start, the time when the runners leave the blocks, is actually timed. The announcers make a big deal out of who got the fastest start. Why? Because the faster the start, the more momentum throughout the race. And how much difference is there between one runner to the next? Only a few thousandths of a second!! That's it. The small difference in momentum at the start ends up being a larger difference at the finish. The difference between winning and losing. Whatever your goals are, you must get a fast start to create this winning momentum.
Momentum is your best friend. I don't care who you are or what you do, momentum is a necessity. Sometimes, momentum is the only difference between winning and losing...achieving and failing. It is extremely difficult to get momentum and even more difficult to keep it. But keep it you must. If you have ever watched the 100 Meter dash in the Olympics you will see that the start, the time when the runners leave the blocks, is actually timed. The announcers make a big deal out of who got the fastest start. Why? Because the faster the start, the more momentum throughout the race. And how much difference is there between one runner to the next? Only a few thousandths of a second!! That's it. The small difference in momentum at the start ends up being a larger difference at the finish. The difference between winning and losing. Whatever your goals are, you must get a fast start to create this winning momentum.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Are You Paid For What you Do? I Hope Not!!
Did you know there are people who want to be paid for what they do? They say things like, "When this company starts paying me for what I'm worth, then I'll do all the things they want me to do." Ummm, what!! I hope you are not this kind of person. Does this truly make any sense at all? Can you imaging going to your boss and saying,
You: Hey, I want you to give me a raise.
Boss: Based on what? You haven't done anything to merit a raise.
You: Exactly. I want you to pay me more so I will start doing more.
Boss: Yeah, right. No. No raise. Besides, it sounds like you are really asking for a promotion. More responsibility, more money.
You: Ok, I want a promotion then.
Boss: Based on what again? You haven't done anything to merit a promotion.
You: Exactly. If you paid me more then I would do more.
Boss. Get out of my office before I fire you!!
Get the picture? You won't get more until you give more. Be the type of person that says, "I'm going to be the best I can be because that's how I am and I know that if I give more than expected I will eventually be rewarded." Give more!! Then you can ask for more and have the proof that you deserve it. Something happens when you put gold into the fire. The real gold separates itself from the crap that has attached to it. You can look around your job, your friends, your environment and see who the real gold is and who the crap is. Which one are you?
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
How to Trust Someone
Trust is what keeps our society functioning. Speaking from an evolutionary perspective, we must trust to survive. But it can be a slippery thing. What makes us trust people? And more curiously, what makes us trust some people but not others? Trust is based on expectation. You expect something from someone and trust them based on whether they lived up to your expectation. Now, past experiences with a person will determine whether or not you trust them but here are a few things to help you define how and why you trust or distrust a person.
Consistency- The more consistent a person behaves, the easier for you to determine a pattern and form an expectation.
Posture- Standing straight and tall gives an aura of strength and confidence and will be more attractive to trusting.
Transparency- When a person seems to be hiding something, we feel as though we cannot fully trust that person. Self-disclosure builds trust.
Discretion- The ability to keep secret the things you share with a person inspires trust.
Familiarity- The more you know about someone, the more you know if and how to trust them.
Resemblance- Birds of a feather.....If someone dresses like you, acts like you do or looks like you, you are more likely to trust that person because you believe they are most similar to you. In NLP, this is called mirroring.
These are just some of the ways that we form an opinion of trust. Likewise, people are also using these to decide whether to trust you or not. Always remember that what you say and what you do is under constant observation.
Consistency- The more consistent a person behaves, the easier for you to determine a pattern and form an expectation.
Posture- Standing straight and tall gives an aura of strength and confidence and will be more attractive to trusting.
Transparency- When a person seems to be hiding something, we feel as though we cannot fully trust that person. Self-disclosure builds trust.
Discretion- The ability to keep secret the things you share with a person inspires trust.
Familiarity- The more you know about someone, the more you know if and how to trust them.
Resemblance- Birds of a feather.....If someone dresses like you, acts like you do or looks like you, you are more likely to trust that person because you believe they are most similar to you. In NLP, this is called mirroring.
These are just some of the ways that we form an opinion of trust. Likewise, people are also using these to decide whether to trust you or not. Always remember that what you say and what you do is under constant observation.
Monday, December 10, 2012
Still a Slave? Or Free at Last?
I'm always hearing and reading of people writing about helping others to be free. Telling people to stop being a slave to others and create financial independence. Guess what? I'm one of those people, too. I know. Some people will say, "But, Scott. I am free. I can choose to do whatever I want." They are right.....to a point. They have freedom of choice but they have chosen to be slaves. Can you believe that anyone would do such a thing? Well, let's have a little history lesson.
In America, we had slavery at one time. Officially, it ended in the 1860's but it never really went away. It only changed. The old kind of slavery was physical. Slaves were kept in chains, kept illiterate, physically beaten as punishment. Today's slavery is more of an economic bondage. Slaves are kept in low paying jobs, credit debt, and barely educated to do their jobs.
Let me tell you a story about the slaves who suffered through physical bondage. Back then, a slave would wake up in the morning and have some strange feeling in the pit of their stomach. They weren't sick, just didn't feel right. Have you ever felt like that? Well, the slave couldn't quite determine what was wrong and so they went out for their day of work. Everyday, the same thing...the same feeling. Eventually, some slaves were able to repress that feeling, or to just deal with it as something that would never go away. Others, though, figured it out. What was that feeling inside of them? It was a small ember. A tiny flame...the flame of freedom burning within them. They KNEW they were meant to be free. Everyday they felt wrong because they were living wrong. And so, they ran away. But not being from America, they didn't know which way to go. What areas would be safe? These escaped slaves were easily caught and brought back for tortuous punishment. But did the flame die. NO!! Eventually, they learned of a place called the "north". A slave could be free in the north. So, they would escape again and head north. But where do you think the slave-catchers would be? Yep, hanging out north of the slave states. Again, slaves would be captured, returned and tortured.
Some slaves would slip through and gain their freedom, though. Out of those, some kept on going and never looked back. They had their freedom and all they wanted to do was make a new life. Others, however, felt a little guilty that they should be free while others still toiled for their masters. The freed men and women began going back south to help others escape safely. The use of certain roads and trails and farmhouses came to be known as the Underground Railroad. Now, the most famous freed person of the Underground Railroad was a little old lady named Harriet Tubman. When she, and others, would pick up another group of escapees she would lead them to freedom. But some escapees would start to have doubts...begin to second guess their choice. They would start to talk about how good they had it back at the master's place. "The master is going to be mad at me. But if I go back now, my punishment might not be so bad. I sure miss what little I had." As they would stop and turn to head back, they would go face to face with Harriet Tubman. She would tell them they weren't going back. The escapee would say yes they were. Back and forth, back and forth until it escalated. Now, being a petite old lady it was mostly a physical mismatch and when the escaped slaves would try to push their way past Harriet, she would pull out her pistol and put it right up against the head of the slave wanting to go back. You see, going back would mean the slave would be tortured until they gave up all the secrets of the Railroad. For the greater good, nobody could return once they set out for freedom. So, Harriet would tell the escapee, "You're either going forward or you're going down. But you ain't going back."
What does all this have to with you here in the modern day. Well, you are either an economic slave or you are an escapee. For those of you who have escaped and found freedom, you may be trying to help others do the same. You have found a way, a system to create your freedom. And you have to have that same toughness with people that you are helping that Harriet Tubman had. There must be no going back. And for those of you who wake up everyday with that horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach as you tumble out of bed to get dressed for that job of yours, well now you know what that feeling is. The flame of freedom. It's calling you. It's burning a hole inside of you...creating discomfort, wanting you to act on it. You need to start finding your personal Underground Railroad....your ticket to financial freedom. And when you start thinking about quitting, turning back, saying how good you had it with the little bit that your master gave you every two weeks, go to the mirror and fix your hand in the shape of a gun and put it to your head and tell yourself...."You're not going back. Ever!" Escape from your corporate master and run away from your cubicle plantation as fast as you can. Only then will you be able to live the words of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr......Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty. I am free, at last!!
In America, we had slavery at one time. Officially, it ended in the 1860's but it never really went away. It only changed. The old kind of slavery was physical. Slaves were kept in chains, kept illiterate, physically beaten as punishment. Today's slavery is more of an economic bondage. Slaves are kept in low paying jobs, credit debt, and barely educated to do their jobs.
Let me tell you a story about the slaves who suffered through physical bondage. Back then, a slave would wake up in the morning and have some strange feeling in the pit of their stomach. They weren't sick, just didn't feel right. Have you ever felt like that? Well, the slave couldn't quite determine what was wrong and so they went out for their day of work. Everyday, the same thing...the same feeling. Eventually, some slaves were able to repress that feeling, or to just deal with it as something that would never go away. Others, though, figured it out. What was that feeling inside of them? It was a small ember. A tiny flame...the flame of freedom burning within them. They KNEW they were meant to be free. Everyday they felt wrong because they were living wrong. And so, they ran away. But not being from America, they didn't know which way to go. What areas would be safe? These escaped slaves were easily caught and brought back for tortuous punishment. But did the flame die. NO!! Eventually, they learned of a place called the "north". A slave could be free in the north. So, they would escape again and head north. But where do you think the slave-catchers would be? Yep, hanging out north of the slave states. Again, slaves would be captured, returned and tortured.
Some slaves would slip through and gain their freedom, though. Out of those, some kept on going and never looked back. They had their freedom and all they wanted to do was make a new life. Others, however, felt a little guilty that they should be free while others still toiled for their masters. The freed men and women began going back south to help others escape safely. The use of certain roads and trails and farmhouses came to be known as the Underground Railroad. Now, the most famous freed person of the Underground Railroad was a little old lady named Harriet Tubman. When she, and others, would pick up another group of escapees she would lead them to freedom. But some escapees would start to have doubts...begin to second guess their choice. They would start to talk about how good they had it back at the master's place. "The master is going to be mad at me. But if I go back now, my punishment might not be so bad. I sure miss what little I had." As they would stop and turn to head back, they would go face to face with Harriet Tubman. She would tell them they weren't going back. The escapee would say yes they were. Back and forth, back and forth until it escalated. Now, being a petite old lady it was mostly a physical mismatch and when the escaped slaves would try to push their way past Harriet, she would pull out her pistol and put it right up against the head of the slave wanting to go back. You see, going back would mean the slave would be tortured until they gave up all the secrets of the Railroad. For the greater good, nobody could return once they set out for freedom. So, Harriet would tell the escapee, "You're either going forward or you're going down. But you ain't going back."
What does all this have to with you here in the modern day. Well, you are either an economic slave or you are an escapee. For those of you who have escaped and found freedom, you may be trying to help others do the same. You have found a way, a system to create your freedom. And you have to have that same toughness with people that you are helping that Harriet Tubman had. There must be no going back. And for those of you who wake up everyday with that horrible feeling in the pit of your stomach as you tumble out of bed to get dressed for that job of yours, well now you know what that feeling is. The flame of freedom. It's calling you. It's burning a hole inside of you...creating discomfort, wanting you to act on it. You need to start finding your personal Underground Railroad....your ticket to financial freedom. And when you start thinking about quitting, turning back, saying how good you had it with the little bit that your master gave you every two weeks, go to the mirror and fix your hand in the shape of a gun and put it to your head and tell yourself...."You're not going back. Ever!" Escape from your corporate master and run away from your cubicle plantation as fast as you can. Only then will you be able to live the words of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr......Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty. I am free, at last!!
Saturday, December 8, 2012
How is Your Memory
Memory is a compelling gift. It has the power to help us grow and to encourage us in difficult times. But memory can also engender fear or nurture revenge. What makes the difference? It all depends on what we choose to remember.
I have been blessed with a pretty good memory. Luckily, I don't remember every negative thing that has happened in my life. Yet, fortunately, I remember many positive events. Sometimes I wonder why I remember any negative events at all. But I remember that I am choosing to keep that memory. I want to remember that particular event so I can use it to help me be a better person. I remember a lot of the abuse I took in my household as a kid. I remember failures from decisions I have made. And I remember these things so as to know how not to do something, which can be as important as knowing how to do something.
I remember wonderful things such as winning track races and being on a championship cross country team. I remember promotions and overcoming obstacles as a Marine. And I remember the birth of my daughters. I like remembering positive things because they remind me of my value and worth. The remind me of my ability and potential.
So, I decide to keep some of my negative memories around to remind me to be better. And I focus on my positive memories of my life to remind me that I am better. Have a memorable day.
I have been blessed with a pretty good memory. Luckily, I don't remember every negative thing that has happened in my life. Yet, fortunately, I remember many positive events. Sometimes I wonder why I remember any negative events at all. But I remember that I am choosing to keep that memory. I want to remember that particular event so I can use it to help me be a better person. I remember a lot of the abuse I took in my household as a kid. I remember failures from decisions I have made. And I remember these things so as to know how not to do something, which can be as important as knowing how to do something.
I remember wonderful things such as winning track races and being on a championship cross country team. I remember promotions and overcoming obstacles as a Marine. And I remember the birth of my daughters. I like remembering positive things because they remind me of my value and worth. The remind me of my ability and potential.
So, I decide to keep some of my negative memories around to remind me to be better. And I focus on my positive memories of my life to remind me that I am better. Have a memorable day.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
WHO ARE YOU?
Hello friends. I have a question for you. Who do you think you are? I remember my mom asking me this when I was little. Usually, it was asked when I was doing something that was beyond what she thought I should be doing. "Who do you think you are, young man? You better come down off your high horse." Now, my mom was the disciplinarian of the house and I knew not be smart-mouthed with her so I never was brave enough to tell her who I thought I was. I thought I was awesome. I thought I was king of the world. I could do whatever I felt like doing. Remember those days? At this stage of your life, this question is going to take some deeper thinking from you. Most of the time you would give an answer that tells what kind of job you have or what country or state you are from, maybe you would reveal what your religion is. But I want you to go a little deeper. For some of you, this is going to be uncomfortable.
You see, many people wake up in the morning and think...Geez, here I am again. Still stuck in this same life. Dull. Boring. Unhappy. Mediocre!! Now, some will attempt to justify their mediocre lives by saying that life could be worse. Well, it could also be better. In fact, life is supposed to be better than mediocre. You were never supposed to be a mediocre person living a mediocre life. You were created to be excellent. Excellence is the normal state of affairs in the human heart. When you pursue excellence, you know you are doing the right thing. And this excellence is not an accident. God programmed it in your heart so that you would feel good when leading an excellent life. Mediocrity is what is abnormal and doesn't feel right.
Excellence has been embedded into your heart. If you have been beaten down into mediocrity, then you need to listen up. Ears open!! Eyes focused!! YOU have the ability to achieve excellence in at least , AT LEAST, one area of your life. What area is that? I have no idea. You'll have to discover that for yourself. But you have been created with certain gifts and talents that you are to use for excellence. To use to create your masterpiece.
In our society, we use the word success when we really mean excellence. We want to have a successful life but what we really desire is an excellent life. We try to define what success is and so often we hear that it is being the best that we can possibly be. Folks, that's excellence. You have been created and programmed to be happy and you will only feel that when you have achieved excellence in some area of your life. Mediocrity doesn't feel right. When you are living in mediocrity, you feel as though you are wasting your life. Don't waste another day. Pursue excellence today!!
You see, many people wake up in the morning and think...Geez, here I am again. Still stuck in this same life. Dull. Boring. Unhappy. Mediocre!! Now, some will attempt to justify their mediocre lives by saying that life could be worse. Well, it could also be better. In fact, life is supposed to be better than mediocre. You were never supposed to be a mediocre person living a mediocre life. You were created to be excellent. Excellence is the normal state of affairs in the human heart. When you pursue excellence, you know you are doing the right thing. And this excellence is not an accident. God programmed it in your heart so that you would feel good when leading an excellent life. Mediocrity is what is abnormal and doesn't feel right.
Excellence has been embedded into your heart. If you have been beaten down into mediocrity, then you need to listen up. Ears open!! Eyes focused!! YOU have the ability to achieve excellence in at least , AT LEAST, one area of your life. What area is that? I have no idea. You'll have to discover that for yourself. But you have been created with certain gifts and talents that you are to use for excellence. To use to create your masterpiece.
In our society, we use the word success when we really mean excellence. We want to have a successful life but what we really desire is an excellent life. We try to define what success is and so often we hear that it is being the best that we can possibly be. Folks, that's excellence. You have been created and programmed to be happy and you will only feel that when you have achieved excellence in some area of your life. Mediocrity doesn't feel right. When you are living in mediocrity, you feel as though you are wasting your life. Don't waste another day. Pursue excellence today!!
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Empower Yourself
Who is responsible for your lot in life? Well, most people will answer, correctly, that they are. But then they point their finger and blame other people and circumstances as holding them back or causing them harm. Folks, you are responsible for you. You cannot control what others do or control events but you can always control how you react. You can control how you use events and people's negative words to your positive advantage.
Many people give advice. And they are usually very well meaning. They have your best interest at heart. So, you take their advice and it doesn't work out. Who's to blame? You are!! No one forced you into your decision. You are free to choose any advice or no advice. Stop being a blamer. Take ownership of your life. Empower your own self. How do you do this?
First, listen to what your heart is telling you. Some might call it their intuition. Or maybe their inner voice....or gut feeling. Whatever you call it, listen to it. Hear what it is telling you. Sometimes, what you will hear from inside yourself makes no sense whatsoever. But you will be better served by following what you are hearing and feeling.
Secondly, when you do go outside yourself for advice and guidance, only seek out those people who are succeeding at what it is that you are struggling with. They have the knowledge through proven experience that will help you. In the end, though, you are still the one responsible for your life. You are the creator. You are also the destroyer of your life. You have a choice in the direction you want your life to go. Someone I look up to says, "Stop being a whiney-hiney thumbsucker." Take ownership of your life. Empower yourself!!
Many people give advice. And they are usually very well meaning. They have your best interest at heart. So, you take their advice and it doesn't work out. Who's to blame? You are!! No one forced you into your decision. You are free to choose any advice or no advice. Stop being a blamer. Take ownership of your life. Empower your own self. How do you do this?
First, listen to what your heart is telling you. Some might call it their intuition. Or maybe their inner voice....or gut feeling. Whatever you call it, listen to it. Hear what it is telling you. Sometimes, what you will hear from inside yourself makes no sense whatsoever. But you will be better served by following what you are hearing and feeling.
Secondly, when you do go outside yourself for advice and guidance, only seek out those people who are succeeding at what it is that you are struggling with. They have the knowledge through proven experience that will help you. In the end, though, you are still the one responsible for your life. You are the creator. You are also the destroyer of your life. You have a choice in the direction you want your life to go. Someone I look up to says, "Stop being a whiney-hiney thumbsucker." Take ownership of your life. Empower yourself!!
Monday, December 3, 2012
Contract Assignments
Hello everyone....Today I want to explain a little of what I do in my real estate investing business. When I tell people that I invest in real estate, they assume that it takes a lot of money. But, really, it doesn't. I use a technique called assignment of contract to make money without putting up any money or very little money of my own.
When I assign a contract, I am putting a property under contract with the seller. I am then finding another buyer for the property and assigning my contract to the new buyer. I then charge the buyer a fee, an assignment fee. This fee might be a set amount or a certain percentage of the sale price. It might range from $1000 to $10,000. The contract is now between the seller and the new buyer and I have now stepped out of the deal while still making some money.Who can do this? Anybody!! No real estate license is necessary.
My favorite type of property at assign is a bank owned property. These are properties that the bank has taken, usually through foreclosure. They are then listed by a real estate agent on behalf of the bank and usually sold at a price that is much lower then its appraised value. The bank is motivated to sell the property to make some cash, the buyer is motivated because they are getting a great deal and the investor is motivated because they see an opportunity to provide a service and make a profit as well. Many people will balk at getting involved with assigning a bank owned property because banks will use language within the contract that states that the contract cannot be assigned and that whoever buys the property cannot resell it within a certain timeframe. This timeframe is mostly between 60-90 days. This becomes unattractive to investors because now the investor has to come up with the money to buy the property and make 2-3 months of payments before selling.
However, there are ways to get around the banks contract language and still make money at the closing. The first way to do this is to simply form a shell LLC. This can be done by going online to state attorney's general website and filling out some forms. There will be a relatively small cost for this, sometimes a few hundred dollars. You then put the property under contract with the bank using the LLC's name. Then, when you have found your buyer for the property, you sell the LLC to that person for the amount you would have gotten for an assignment fee. Voila!!! You have legally and expertly gotten around the bank. But, there is an even more attractive method to use.
The best way to invest in bank owned properties and not have the banks contractual language prevent you from making money in a timely manner is to do a double closing. A double closing is when there are two, back-to-back, closings all in the same day between the three parties involved....you, the buyer and the seller(bank). There is something called a simultaneous close which does the same thing but uses only one close between all three parties. But when you use a simultaneous close all three parties can see the deal made among the three. In a double closing, each party can only see the contract made between them and the party they are dealing with. Why is this important? Well, let's use an example. The bank owns a property that is worth $250k. It is selling the property for $220k and we negotiate a deal that will allow us to buy it for $200k, not an unrealistic scenario. We enter into a contract with the bank to buy the property for $200k and we find our new buyer. We show this new buyer how much the property is actually worth and in our negotiations, we agree on a price of $220k. Now, we have bought the house for $200k and resold it for $220k AND we are not going to have to use any of our own money. Here's why....at the day of closing, the first person to arrive at the title company is the new buyer. They bring in all the money required, the $220k plus any fees and closing costs. They then sign their paperwork and are done. The next person to come in will be the bank's representative. They will sign their paperwork and pick up their check for the $200k they agreed to sell the property for. Then, I come in last. I sign my paperwork and collect any money due to me, in this case the $20k in difference between what I bought the property for from the bank and what I sold it for to the new buyer. Now, during a simultaneous close the new buyer would have seen my deal with the bank and not been happy. The bank would have seen my deal with the new buyer and not been happy. But with a double close, the bank on;y sees the deal they made with me. The new buyer only sees the deal they made with me. And everyone is happy with their deal. The bank sold a property that they owned and made some money. The new buyer bought the property they wanted at the price they wanted and have instant equity in the property. And I sold a property for a $20k profit instead of maybe $5k if I had just been able to assign the contract. Oh Happy Day!!
Visit us on Facebook at Mountain City Property Assets
When I assign a contract, I am putting a property under contract with the seller. I am then finding another buyer for the property and assigning my contract to the new buyer. I then charge the buyer a fee, an assignment fee. This fee might be a set amount or a certain percentage of the sale price. It might range from $1000 to $10,000. The contract is now between the seller and the new buyer and I have now stepped out of the deal while still making some money.Who can do this? Anybody!! No real estate license is necessary.
My favorite type of property at assign is a bank owned property. These are properties that the bank has taken, usually through foreclosure. They are then listed by a real estate agent on behalf of the bank and usually sold at a price that is much lower then its appraised value. The bank is motivated to sell the property to make some cash, the buyer is motivated because they are getting a great deal and the investor is motivated because they see an opportunity to provide a service and make a profit as well. Many people will balk at getting involved with assigning a bank owned property because banks will use language within the contract that states that the contract cannot be assigned and that whoever buys the property cannot resell it within a certain timeframe. This timeframe is mostly between 60-90 days. This becomes unattractive to investors because now the investor has to come up with the money to buy the property and make 2-3 months of payments before selling.
However, there are ways to get around the banks contract language and still make money at the closing. The first way to do this is to simply form a shell LLC. This can be done by going online to state attorney's general website and filling out some forms. There will be a relatively small cost for this, sometimes a few hundred dollars. You then put the property under contract with the bank using the LLC's name. Then, when you have found your buyer for the property, you sell the LLC to that person for the amount you would have gotten for an assignment fee. Voila!!! You have legally and expertly gotten around the bank. But, there is an even more attractive method to use.
The best way to invest in bank owned properties and not have the banks contractual language prevent you from making money in a timely manner is to do a double closing. A double closing is when there are two, back-to-back, closings all in the same day between the three parties involved....you, the buyer and the seller(bank). There is something called a simultaneous close which does the same thing but uses only one close between all three parties. But when you use a simultaneous close all three parties can see the deal made among the three. In a double closing, each party can only see the contract made between them and the party they are dealing with. Why is this important? Well, let's use an example. The bank owns a property that is worth $250k. It is selling the property for $220k and we negotiate a deal that will allow us to buy it for $200k, not an unrealistic scenario. We enter into a contract with the bank to buy the property for $200k and we find our new buyer. We show this new buyer how much the property is actually worth and in our negotiations, we agree on a price of $220k. Now, we have bought the house for $200k and resold it for $220k AND we are not going to have to use any of our own money. Here's why....at the day of closing, the first person to arrive at the title company is the new buyer. They bring in all the money required, the $220k plus any fees and closing costs. They then sign their paperwork and are done. The next person to come in will be the bank's representative. They will sign their paperwork and pick up their check for the $200k they agreed to sell the property for. Then, I come in last. I sign my paperwork and collect any money due to me, in this case the $20k in difference between what I bought the property for from the bank and what I sold it for to the new buyer. Now, during a simultaneous close the new buyer would have seen my deal with the bank and not been happy. The bank would have seen my deal with the new buyer and not been happy. But with a double close, the bank on;y sees the deal they made with me. The new buyer only sees the deal they made with me. And everyone is happy with their deal. The bank sold a property that they owned and made some money. The new buyer bought the property they wanted at the price they wanted and have instant equity in the property. And I sold a property for a $20k profit instead of maybe $5k if I had just been able to assign the contract. Oh Happy Day!!
Visit us on Facebook at Mountain City Property Assets
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)