Your Value to the World

I had the most amazing conversation yesterday. Someone that I am connected with on Facebook contacted me and what I thought was an hour conversation was actually 2 hours. The time just flowed by so easily. The first thing that was said was a compliment on how much she enjoyed my Facebook page. Now this person is very successful. Some people would even consider her to have some celebrity status. So, for that reason I felt a little shocked at first. Someone of her stature? Taking time to compliment me? Spending 2 hours in conversation with ME?

But over those 2 hours, I learned some things. First, behind every "celebrity" is a real person. Someone who likes the same things that everyone else likes. Or dislikes. Food, music, experiences, desires, fears....they are as human as anyone else. It took virtually no time at all for me to feel very comfortable with this person. We spoke about different things, getting to know one another. We seemed to be resonating on the same wavelength. And why shouldn't we?

The second thing I learned was that not all people who have some level of celebrity actually want that kind of attention. They didn't originally set out to be famous. They set out to be the best they could be. The best pianist, the best football player, the best singer. Sometimes, people become celebrities just from doing a simple act. They set out to make a statement or do a good deed. When I was in high school, I was very much into running. At that time, there was a man in Canada who became famous for running. No, he didn't win an Olympic gold medal. This man had gotten cancer and one of his legs had been amputated. He wore a prosthesis. Yet, he decided to run all the way across Canada to raise money and awareness to fight cancer. The man's name was Terry Fox. He even had a movie made about his journey. Point is, all that fame was not what he desired. Making an impact within his world was what he was after.

The third thing I learned is that we all have value. This person yesterday valued me. She didn't see me as a minion or a fan or a lesser person. We were just 2 humans appreciating each other's value. Without her contacting me, though, I never would have known how she felt....how she viewed me. You have value as well, friends. Some days people let you know how wonderful you are and how something you said or did affected them in a positive way. Other days no one communicates with you. However, that doesn't mean your message fell on deaf ears. It doesn't mean that your kind act in the grocery store went unappreciated. It doesn't mean your kind words or sound advice went unheeded. Someone is always watching you, always listening to you, always looking up to you. Believe that!! You are having a profoundly positive effect on someone that you don't even know right now. Just keep putting out the value of who you are. The people who don't deserve your value, won't get it. The people who deserve it but aren't ready to receive it yet, won't get it. But the people who are ready for you, whether they realize they need it or not, are going to be led to you. And if you are withholding your value because you don't believe you have anything to offer the world, then you are cheating someone of something they needed. You are cheating our world out of positive actions that are so desperately needed. And you are cheating yourself out of the beautiful feeling you will have knowing that you are a light to someone in need. Not to mention that you will cheat yourself from being your authentic self. Today, be you. Be valuable!!

The Badass Within

This past weekend I attended a business event here in Austin. The company that hosted the event is an international company. There were people from various countries who traveled in to attend. So many wonderful and positive things happened for me at this event but it was the title of the event that resonated within me. The event was called "Release Your Inner Badass".

Now some people will see that and just think it is some catchy and edgy title and nothing more. But to me it has a deeper meaning. To be able to release something means that you must be possessing it in the first place. And an inner badass? This implies that I am already a badass but that it is residing inside of me, where no one else can see it.

What does it mean to be badass? What is a badass? To me, a badass is someone who owns up to who they are. They are not inhibited or affected by what others may think of them. A badass is secure and confident while at the same time being the best at what they do. And If they aren't the best, they accept that and work their butts off to be better than what they are. A badass speaks honestly. You aren't going to get much fluff or hype from them. They get to the point when they speak.

A badass person doesn't advertise their status. They don't have to, nor want to. Because they have released their inner badass, it is now an outer badass. It isn't hidden. Others can see it, therefore there isn't the need for bluster and bravado. Have you ever seen a Clint Eastwood movie where the character bragged about how badass he was? I never have. The character exuded supreme confidence. And this is what you need to release from inside of yourself. That badass, supremely confident person that is hiding deep within you.

Release it. Throw off the chains of what others may think. Remove the leash that you are choking your true self with. Leashes are for dogs. And you, my friend, are no dog. You are a BADASS!! Now let the world see it.

I Like Being Recognized

I like to be recognized for when I do something good. How about you? If you are like most people, and I think you are, then you love to be recognized for your efforts. Last night, I went to a meeting at church and was pleasantly surprised to be named Volunteer of the Month for December. What a nice honor. I received a certificate and had all my peers congratulating me. I was proud. Some of you may say, what's the big deal?

Well, recognition is a prize that a person gets for positive behavior. If you reward that positive behavior, you will get more positive behavior. Then, you give more reward and get more positive behavior and so on. The recognition becomes a motivator. It lets people know that their performance was valued. It builds confidence for future behavior and performance. And it makes people happy. And happier people are positive people.

You don't need to be a supervisor or a manager to recognize good performance. How many of you are parents? How about recognizing your child for their positive behaviors? Do that consistently and see what happens to your child. Is the clerk at the convenience store especially nice? Then tell them so. Thank them for being very friendly and helpful and let them know how happy you are to see them when you come into the store. Begin consistently recognizing the positives that your spouse does. You can do this with anyone. Your child's teacher, a receptionist, a barista, a restaurant server....the list is endless.

When I was a restaurant manager, there was a couple who were regulars. They always made it a point to stick their head in the window to the kitchen and told the cooks what a great job they were doing. On some occasions, they even tipped the cooks. The cooks worked amazingly better after one of those episodes. They felt more pride in what they were doing. They were motivated to put their best effort into their work. They were happier. And that is what a little recognition can do.

If you want better results from people, you are going to have to recognize the good they are already doing. Sometimes it is hard to find the good that someone is doing. But if you don't recognize and reward that small positive behavior then you are unlikely to get anything more from them. I had a guy who worked for me when I was a Marine in California. No one else wanted anything to do with him. But I never had a problem with him. Everyone else wanted to yell at him and belittle him for being a screwup. I never did that with him. I yelled at others because that's what they needed to perform better. But not this guy. He made me look like a genius or some kind of great leader. I wasn't either one. I was just someone who saw the positives this guy was doing and recognized him for it.

And that's what I want you to do. I want you to recognize people in your life who are doing something positive so you can get more of that behavior. Or maybe you want them to perform better than they are. Either way, the key lies in rewarding the positive performance they are giving now. It may be a small gift or just a sincere thank you. Whatever it is, make sure you reference the behaviors that you want more of. I can assure you through my experience, you will love the results you elicit from others. Have a great day!!

Are You Paid For What you Do? I Hope Not!!

Did you know there are people who want to be paid for what they do? They say things like, "When this company starts paying me for what I'm worth, then I'll do all the things they want me to do." Ummm, what!! I hope you are not this kind of person. Does this truly make any sense at all? Can you imaging going to your boss and saying,

You: Hey, I want you to give me a raise.

Boss: Based on what? You haven't done anything to merit a raise.

You: Exactly. I want you to pay me more so I will start doing more.

Boss: Yeah, right. No. No raise. Besides, it sounds like you are really asking for a promotion. More responsibility, more money.

You: Ok, I want a promotion then.

Boss: Based on what again? You haven't done anything to merit a promotion. 

You: Exactly. If you paid me more then I would do more.

Boss. Get out of my office before I fire you!!

Get the picture? You won't get more until you give more. Be the type of person that says, "I'm going to be the best I can be because that's how I am and I know that if I give more than expected I will eventually be rewarded." Give more!! Then you can ask for more and have the proof that you deserve it. Something happens when you put gold into the fire. The real gold separates itself from the crap that has attached to it. You can look around your job, your friends, your environment and see who the real gold is and who the crap is. Which one are you?